Roadmap for
Motivating More Long-Term Responsible Behavior
HOW THINGS ARE NOW
*Your child doesn’t do what they’re supposed to do… You have to ask them 5 times (and/or yell) to motivate them to do anything
*You’re often dealing with negotiations, power struggles, or meltdowns
*Things you’ve tried (punishments, rewards, behavior charts, bribes, etc.) haven’t work to motivate better behavior in the long run.
HOW YOU WANT THINGS TO BE
*Your child does something the first time you ask
*Even when they don’t feel like doing something, they do it anyway (with minimal complaining).
*Your child is actually internally motivated so you don’t have to be so involved
If things are not consistently the way you want them to be…
ask yourself these questions and use these tools for long-term change:
1. Are your rules firm (clear, enforced
consistently, and enforced without
emotion)?
If not, use these tools:
Identify which rules to enforce
Enforce rules consistently
Deal with your Yuck
2. Does your child have all the tools they
need to do what you ask?
3. Does your request immediately put
them into Yuck?
If so, use these tools:
Identify (and care about) what’s under behavior
Make a plan for consistent deposits
4. Do you have an effective plan for handling their
behavior in the moment?
Download a “pretty” version of this roadmap below:
PAST TRAININGS ON THIS TOPIC
MOTIVATING COOPERATION ON-DEMAND TRAINING
PAST LIVE TRAINING: How to Create Routines That Work (8/7/19)
PAST LIVE TRAINING: Teaching Kids the Tools They MUST HAVE To Behave (4/3/19)
PAST LIVE TRAINING: How to Foster Internal Motivation (6/7/18)
PAST LIVE TRAINING: Handling Issues Related to Electronics (2/6/19)
Recording (Facebook Live)
Workbook (PDF)
PAST GUEST EXPERT TRAINING: Keeping Kids Safe Online (5/28/19)
with Lisa Honhold, Online Safety Advocate
Recording (Youtube video)
Bark, the monitoring app (with 20% discount)
Build your personalized online contract
PAST LIVE TRAINING: How to Get Kids to Do More Around the House
PAST SCRIPTS ON THIS TOPIC
When Your Child Won’t Do Routine Tasks (That They Know How To Do)
When Your Child Won’t Stop Doing Something That Is Annoying Others
When Your Child Won’t Do What They’re Supposed To Do
When Your Child Is Not Motivated To Do Homework
When Your Children Are Not Motivated to Clean Up
When Your Child Is Not Motivated to Go to Sleep
When Your Child Is Not Motivated To Get Off of Electronics
Improving Your Influence by Showing That You Mean What You Say
Improving Your Influence by NOT Making Threats When You’re in Yuck
Improving Your Influence by Respecting Your Child’s Point of View
Improving Your Influence by Teaching Your Child How to Be Successful
How to Use Joint Problem Solving to Get Kids to Clean (And Do Other Chores)
How to Address Behavior Proactively to Make Transitions Smoother
How to Address Behavior Proactively to Make Routines Smoother
How to Address Behavior Proactively to Reduce Kids’ Resistance